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Real-life Uses for Active Server Pages
(how to have fun with web technologies)
by Heferito

In that past month or so I have come up with some rather creative uses for Active Server Pages here on my site.  Most of you will never come across the pages that I am talking about, because they are built especially for a couple of key individuals who I do not really care for.  Active Server Pages allow you to make your website "come alive" for your visitors.  Consider this recent application:

1.  Idiots from Ebaum's World

Back in November I wrote an article criticizing Ebaum's world for using entirely unoriginal content.  Ebaum recently discovered this page and has since put up a link to the article on his front page.  At first I found the emails to be quite amusing, but eventually it reached a point where I was just plain annoyed.  It wouldn't have been so bad if at least ONE of the emails had any shred of brainpower.  Basically I ended up receiving 10 emails per day telling me how gay I am.  Real intelligent and thoughtful insults.

Then it came to me one night as I was lying in bed - why not add a few lines of code to the page that unleashes oh say forty pop-ups if someone comes into the page through the Ebaum's World link.  Although it was a simple application of ASP and Javascript it works like pure magic.  Upon entering the page a barrage of pop-ups assaults the moronic visitor.  The extra twist is that I used a mockery of one of Ebaum's actual pop-up ads where he is trying to sell chunks of moon rock.  My moon photo instead shows three bare asses coming out of the water.  Talk about funny stuff - you can take a look at it here. (don't worry there's only one, not forty)

So there you have it... ASP isn't just for work anymore.  Then next time you find that someone is really pissing you off, just take a look at your server logs and come up with same creative retaliation.  I am willing to bet that the link on Ebaum's page won't be around for much longer.  If it is then I am sure that his moon junk sponsor and his site visitors will become pretty annoyed.  And I will be that one that lol.

The best part about this is that any of you think this has to do with eBaum OR his site.  At this point I am just becoming amused at how many of YOU IDIOTS send me flaming emails  about how much my site sucks and then you keep coming back to the site every other day.   I have the log files to prove it!  Do you really think that giving me MORE and MORE traffic to my site is EVER going to upset me?  Thanks for being such a bunch of troglodytes!

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