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My Recent conversations with an AOL employee
(now THIS is funny stuff!)

In case you weren't aware of it I have a section on the site that tells you how to cancel your AOL account, as well as a pretty big collection of testimonials from people who are thankful for the information that I have provided them.  AOL is a big stinky ball of horrible business practices and escaping from their web of deceit can be nearly impossible.

I have had this page on my site for just about 4 years, but something new happened to me this week - someone emailed me to STICK UP FOR AOL!  I know that this may be hard to believe, so here is the transcript of our conversation so far.  I will continue to update this page as needed.
 

From: Email address removed due to personal request
To: <webmaster@heferito.com>
CC:
Date: Tue, 31 Aug 2004 01:41:31 EDT
Subject: your bullshit
you know what man, your site is bullshit. You and all your techie wannabe friends, all you do is complain about AOL on your website... Let me ask you then, why do you come back? After your account is cancelled, WHY DO YOU COME BACK? why do you click on that signup screen AFTER your account is terminated. You spoke with the retention people, so you would know whats up... If you ACTUALLY LISTENED TO WHAT THEY SAY. They ALWAYS inform you of what date your account is cancelled on. NOW AOL does NOT bill people for no reason. If you sign on AFTER your cancellation date, you automatically REACTIVATE your account. Its simple. If you dont want aol, tell the retention person straight up. Tell them you dont want it. They will cancel you once they feel you have enough information. TIP: dont cut off a retention consultant, they will only inform you more about the GREAT deals that aol offers. DONT WHINE DONT COMPLAIN... USE IT OR DONT USE IT.... AOL DOES NOT STEAL UR MONEY. You agree to have them take it from you, you agree to use the service. go to keyword:TOS.

So I wrote back like any good person would, and told the friendly employee to fuck off and die.  I also made the comment that "you must be getting paid by AOL if you're sticking up for them like this."  This was supposed to be a joke, but as you will read below, it hit pretty close to the mark.
 

From: Email address removed due to personal request
To: <heferito@heferito.com>
CC:
Date: Thu, 2 Sep 2004 05:58:59 EDT
Subject: Re: your bullshit
AOL Member Agreement ... check that out.. maybe it will be of some use to you... you know what? AOL.. whenever there is a billing problem, and you actually take some initiative to actually CALL SOMEONE ABOUT IT INSTEAD OF WHINING ONLINE ABOUT IT. Aol does give credit, whether it be free months, cash in your pocket, fee buy downs, or anything that anyone needs. There should be a lawsuit against YOUR SITE for defamation of character against certain individuals as myself. YES, I AM EMPLOYED BY AMERICA ONLINE. I am a customer care consultant. I guess you are aware of my job duties, as you assumed something that is totally wrong about people like myself. I am a normal human being, i put my pants on the same way you do everyday of my life. I am not here to sell someone something. I dont sell anything for aol. I help people with whatever they want. THATS IT. Some people come across as pushy reps, because most of them are most likely in danger of losing their job. I truly care about every single member i deal with, and it honestly bothers me to see people's testimonials about how HORRIBLE AOL is. Think about how many people call us up to tell us how GOOD THE SERVICE IS? Not a lot. We live in a negative world. A world where positive feedback is not wanted, and negative feedback should only be observed. 35 million members worldwide. 35 million. stop your complaining. use it or dont use it. get over it.

HaHa now here's a clever bit -"Some people come across as pushy reps, because most of them are most likely in danger of losing their job."  That sounds like a GREAT company to work for!  I can really see why you're so determined to stick up for them.

Apparently AOL employees aren't too bright.  I did try calling AOL numerous times.  If he or she had taken the time to read my story they would have known that.  My favorite part of the crapstorm response is the following line:  "35 million members worldwide. 35 million. stop your complaining. "   Is that number supposed to impress me?  Just about every computer sold now comes with a free six months of AOL with it.  Since there around 300 million computers sold each year, that's guarantees at least a couple million members each year who are sucked in!  It's not like people are choosing AOL!  The bottom line is that they can't even keep people who they give it to!

 

webmaster@heferito.com